Apparently Harrah’s would not like people to use certain familiar letters considered an abbreviation for the world’s largest poker event more than a few times in one blog entry so I will now be using WLPE to describe something we all know. And hate.

 

Man I’d really like to get behind the World’s Largest Poker Event but they always find stupefying and new ways to completely mismanage a summer. Last year they ‘accidentally’ slipped 2 million chips into the main event and assembled a bunch of dealers not even fit to hand out cards at most home games.

 

I’ve only been in Vegas less than 24 hours but Harrahs’ flagship event is already sailing us through raw sewage. You may have already heard about the new card fiasco. It’s already been well documented and heartily roasted, but to make a long story short, the WLPE introduced some new cards whose design made it virtually impossible to tell a nine from a six. Doyle Brunson, the Godfather himself, took one look and said, “What the hell are these?”

 

Mercifully, they managed to fix this problem before I got here. What they made no attempt to fix was the ridiculously long line to register for events. I got to the Rio around midnight last night. I’d already heard the horror stories of three hour long waits so I looked around for some other way. Maybe they’d have a VIP section or some way to avoid waiting till 3a.m. to register.

No luck for me. I waited for an hour, then my friend waiting with me told me to go play some poker. I left and and an hour later, we figured out there was a secret line for Diamond Card holders and wait times for this one were less than 15 minutes. I have one of these cards so at around 2:30a.m., I finally registered for event # 3, the $1,500 No-Limit. I think Harrahs could have done with one less Milwaukee’s Beast inflatable sign to post a little “Oh by the way” about that Diamond line. Look I realize there are a lot of degenerate gamblers converging on one conference room but this place makes the Las Vegas DMV lines look brisk. Love ya guys.